Now, as I think this post is generally off topic and a request for help, I think it is only fair I give something of value back to you. Below is a list 'definitions' I wrote the last time I was looking for work...
Entry Level | Low pay, lotsa work, no future |
Ability to work independently | No support staff, you're on your own |
Experienced | No training provided |
Team player | Boss gets credit, you get blame |
Salary history required | We don't want someone we have to pay a lot for |
Salary requirements | We don't want to read all the resumes we'll get...note: see above |
Salary negotiable | We don't know how much to pay, or the more you can do, the less we can pay |
Excellant benefits | The salary is below average |
Flexible hours | Overtime and weekend required with no notice |
Self starter | You must know the job in the first week |
Room for advancement | We want to replace your future boss but pay less for the position |
Casual environment | 1. Dress down on alternate Fridays 2. Personnel reviews done in company lunchroom or at company parties |
Supervisory position | We'll blame you for the other people's screw ups |
Leadership abilities | Your boss wants someone to cover for him while he golfs |
Ability to take charge | Your boss works 60-70 hours a week and has been looking very pale lately |
Boss' right hand | 1. Boss has two left hands, or... 2. Boss needs someone to do his work also |
College grads encouraged | We hope you'll take anything to pay off your loans |
Re-entering work force | You earn the same as you would as a stay at home mom without the cute smiles....or We'll pay you entry level rates and expect managerial experience |
Managerial experience | You'll be expected to supervise a bunch of children |
Diverse environment | We have one of everything here |
Experienced only | You'll be the only one that can do the job |
College degree required | We want to say that we have a college degreed person doing this menial job |
Customer service | You'll have to answer the phones when the Receptionist is at lunch |
HS Diploma or equvalent required | We need a warm body |
Some college required | Teenagers need not apply |
Advanced degree required | We mean it...you have to know something about this |
MBA | We want a fast track program and you're it! |
No experience required, we'll train | It's our way or no way |
Some experience | We'll let you do the grunt work |
10 years experience | You teach us |
Support busy manager | You make the coffee and pick up the laundry |
Family environment | Babysit the bosses kids |
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